The Spirited Traveler at Age 5

Last year I wrote about the challenges and strategies for traveling with my spirited little boy Caleb. Mary Sheedy Kurcinka describes a spirited child as "a normal child who is more. They are more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent, energetic." My little Caleb continues to be all these things... and more!

The biggest challenge with traveling with him -- gosh even mornings, bedtime, or weekends when we don't travel at all -- is the transitions. When we travel he is on pins and needles leading up to the transition, takes awhile to settle into the transition ... lather, rinse, repeat.  One of the outcomes of major transitions, like travel, is the inevitable meltdown.

I love traveling with my boys, but airports tend to be the focal point for a transition-induced meltdown. Especially at the end of the trip when Caleb is disappointed and sad that the trip is over, and anxious about going home. As we embarked on our Florida trip I flashed back to last year's end of the trip airport meltdown.  "Meltdown at Gate C3" was a full kicking, screaming, yelling and crying meltdown in the middle of the gate check area as we waited to board the flight.  It was a major scene with people standing around and pointing at us, and saying "I hope that child isn't on our flight." It was over a bag of chips, and much, much more. All of his emotions coalesced in a major meltdown.  

So it was on this the one year anniversary of "Meltdown at Gate C3" I felt some trepidation about the Florida trip. But I'm happy to report it was without incident. We have finally outgrown the meltdown. Yes we did have some minor temper tantrums,  whining, angry outbursts and even a few tears -- but no meltdowns.

I'd like to say it was because of some great parenting trick. We did implement certain strategies to address the meltdowns - before (reading the signs that one was coming, and avoiding situations where Caleb was overly tired, stimulated or hungry), during (giving him a little space, comforting him and letting him win a little bit on something small), and after (discussing with Caleb how he could more appropriately communicate his feelings). But I really think that Caleb at age five finally outgrew the meltdown.

Vacation by Yelp

In 2001 we spent two weeks in Germany, Switzerland and mostly Italy. Most of the trip was planned and booked with recommendations from Rick Steves. Jonathan loves Rick Steves. Every quaint hotel we visited, and tiny little restaurant we frequented was packed with Americans in their 50s flipping through their worn copies of Europe Through the Back Door. We had better luck six years later in Austria, which is less of an American tourist destination than Italy.

We needed a better strategy, and one that works well for everywhere we plan to go. But touristing is hard. How do you get the local recommendations, and avoid the tourist traps without a great guide book?  If you use a web search engine you get lists of activities that are overwhelming, and many times just advertisements.

So today, at least for trips in the US, you can use Yelp, at least we do. Type in "kid activities" in any location and you get a recommendations of things to do. You can check the ratings, read the reviews and bypass the paid for lists. But make sure that you read several of the reviews ... For example, one place that we are planning on visiting has only 3.5 stars. But the worst review says "if you are over 13 stay away, this place is not for you!" As the parent of a 5 and 6 year old I read this as "if you have a 5 and 6 year old go, your kids will have a blast!" Which is in line with what other reviewers said.

A boat tour was listed under "kid activities" which got sucked into the Yelp search engine because one patron complained about kids being on the tour. And how kids shouldn't be allowed on until they are old enough to behave. Since it was a snorkeling and scuba tour -- it probably doesn't meet our requirements for safe fun with our little boys anyway.

We've used Yelp to find our favorite restaurants in Sacramento, and a decent cup of coffee in Michigan after our red-eye.  You can use Yelp for international destinations, but the information is much more spotty, and if you don't speak the local language, you will need to use a translation engine.

I'm relying heavily on Yelp for our upcoming South Florida trip. This time we want to go the Everglades, as well as the Florida Keys. I found the air boat tour and nature show which will give the boys plenty of opportunities to see alligators and mangroves, as well as our activities in the Keys (dolphins and bottomless boats). I also found the restaurants we will be taking the boys to (typing kid-friendly restaurant did the trick).

Will Yelp replace the tourist guide book? Probably not, we love the preset itineraries in Lonely Planet books when traveling in Russia, Asia, Australia or South America, and Rick Steve's wonderful recommendations in Europe ... however, at least for our US trips, we are relying less and less on guide books, and more on Yelp.

Cub Scouts Pinewood Derby Days

Even when Xander was a preschooler I pictured him as a Cub Scout. His interests are nature, science, cooking and art. He likes to be the little helper. When he finished kindergarten, I couldn't wait to sign him up. And although I personally don't like the pack meetings (with 170 families it is too big, runs too long, and starts too late for a school night) -- Xander has, for the most part enjoyed his experience so far.

Enter the Pinewood Derby. Pinewood Derbies are car races of hand built wooden cars that are rolled down a track. The cars are the same weight (5 grams) and it is an exercise in aerodynamics and ingenuity. It is also something targeted at nine year olds. And thus the rub.

With the Pinewood Derby coming in January, Jonathan met the other Tiger Cubs (i.e. first graders) and their parents at a woodworking shop. There they created their cars out of a chunk of wood. Now by they, I mean the parents, since first graders and power tools could be a very messy mix. We then painted the car on New Years Day. Xander helped, but most of the painting was done by me. Then Jonathan attached the wheels and calibrated the weights. You get the point, Xander was barely engaged, and honestly never played with cars so had little interest in building one.

Pinewood Derby weekend was a whole production. The 70 or so cars were run 6 times each  (4 tracks) in the preliminary rounds and then the finalists were run more. All and all two and a half hours of intense racing. Meanwhile, parents were checking their watches, since it was playoff weekend, and everyone wanted to get home to watch the 49ers and Giants play.  And I noticed many of the kids lost interest and started playing video games. The event suffered from the same fate as our pack meetings, it is too large a group for events to be anything other than chaotic and bit boring (it takes a long time for everyone to get a turn). On the bright side, our den leader got feedback that our Tiger cubs were well behaved.

We are still on the fence on Cub Scouts. We like the smaller den meetings, camping trips and group hikes. But it has been a huge time commitment. This month alone, we have the blue and gold dinner, followed by a camping trip.  I'm more reticent to sign Caleb up this summer, even though he has expressed enthusiasm for it. Mostly we're feeling overcommitted ... but I don't think that will change until the boys head off to college.

13 Hours in Disneyland - in 3D

Last Thursday night Jonathan noticed a text from our next door neighbor. He had obtained free passes to Disneyland, did we want to go? We had to use them that weekend!

Strangely enough, it was the one weekend where we had no plans. No Cub Scouts. No ice skating. No soccer. No baseball. And Xander had just been recognized as a Super Citizen for the first 100 days of school (kind of an uber award for the best of the monthly Super Citizens). So, why not go to Disneyland?

Jonathan and I looked up hotels, found a great deal for $90 a night in Orange, Calif., and we were packed and ready to drive-down Friday night.

Our last visit to Disneyland was just October 2010, and our last visit to Disney World was February 2011. Could so much change? Yes. Visiting Disneyland with a five and six year old is a much different experience than with a four and five year old. The most noticeable change is that both boys are now 46 inches or taller. This means that they can go on Indiana Jones. And their threshold for amusement park fun is also much higher. 13 hours versus 7 hours! We could go on more rides and we could spend a longer time at the park without any painful meltdowns.

We also were able to stay after dark and watch the water show at California Adventure and the fireworks at Disneyland.  

The added bonus were that these tickets allowed us to do a "park-hopper." Meaning at the end of the day when Disneyland was too much, we could transition over to California Adventure across the square. California Adventure was slightly more low key (it could be because much of the park is under construction), and the food lines are shorter, and the food is better.

The other difference, which I didn't quite notice the last time was the presence of 3D glasses. In all, four attractions handed out the quirky fashion statements - Star Tours, Buzz Lightyear Astro Blasters, Toy Story Mania and Muppet*Vision in 3D.

We also were delighted to learn that our six year old, Xander, loves roller coasters. Big monstrous, scary roller coasters. He went on California Screaming after dinner, and it was the highlight of his day. Next time we'll try Space Mountain. By the way he was surprised that he didn't fall out when the ride went upside down.

Caleb doesn't love roller coasters. He tried Splash Mountain and Indiana Jones and neither were his favorite. His favorite was Pirates of the Caribbean. We'll see what he is up for on our next visit. Probably not in 2012, but maybe in 2013. I wonder how the experience will be different with a six and seven year old.